by Little Miss Attila on April 11, 2009


Pirates Now Called “Sea Citizens”
WASHINGTON, D.C. – In the wake of Somali pirate attacks on U.S. ships, a State Department spokesperson announced the word “pirate” would no longer be used. “We’re referring to nautical individuals who have seized Americans as ‘sea citizens,'” stated Meredeth Kearns-Gosplan. “‘Pirate”‘carries a negative connotation that could incense various maritime groups, thus causing the very condition we’re working to prevent.” Kearns-Gosplan stated that terminology changes were a new, previously untapped tool in the State Department arsenal.

{ 2 comments… read them below or add one }

Caius Marcius April 11, 2009 at 8:17 am

No doubt, the State Department will soon be advocating for performances of “The Sea-Citizens of Penzance” in theatres, and “Sea-Citizens of the Carribean” at Blockbusters. Not to mention the firm line they will take against China for sea-citizening software.


Dean_L April 11, 2009 at 11:07 am

Will the administration mount an On-the-seas contingency operation? Will the seas-citizens honor the Law of The Sea Treaty? And how long until these sea-citizens are finally recognized as freedom fighters?

Seriously, the response from the Obama administration has been abysmal. But since there’s no possible apporpriations that this particular crisis could bolster other than perhaps for the Navy, I can see why they aren’t pursuing it with any sort of vigor.


Leave a Comment

Previous post:

Next post: